you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
