Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
