and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
