Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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