I want to stick my p in your. b.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
