hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
be right there i have to get my cape
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
