i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
