Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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