If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
