It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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