Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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