so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
