i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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