I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Randomize
