Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.�
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
