No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
