i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
