Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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