You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
