I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
