On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
