all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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