playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
