We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize