Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
