just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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