I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize