Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
