playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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