I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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