So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
