well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
