I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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