dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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