youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She told me I should be a condom model.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
