Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
