There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
