if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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