So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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