there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Randomize