if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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