Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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