I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
My ass is underappreciated
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Randomize
