but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
That accounts for only three of the penises
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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