Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
