now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize