that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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