I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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