Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
