Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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